Why Are These Families Feuding

Recently, my cousin suggested for us to attempt to become contestants on Family Feud. I think anyone who has ever viewed the game show thought about participating, but I don’t think it would be a good idea; for other family members, “yes,” for me, “no.” I can never be a contestant on the show because I would refuse to comply with the tradition of cheering for completely asinine guesses.

     Usually, one of the family members gives an answer which leaves the audience thinking, “did this person even hear the question?” It seems as if the other team members are obligated to lend their support; we have to listen to claps and shouts of, “good answer!” It’s completely insane!

The actual reason for me not wanting to appear on the show has nothing to do with my inability to support the “common-sense-challenged;” it has to do with my fear of having a brain fart and spewing out some nonsensical answer. (I have no desire to live on in YouTube infamy!)

Last week, once I was relieved of my managerial duties, I decided to take a couple days off before being placed back on my normal schedule of 11am to 5pm. (I’m not spoiled; I work extremely hard!) During my forty-eight hour sabbatical, I had the pleasure of reuniting with an old friend, Family Feud. Hands down, the best aspect of the show is when eager participants panic and bark-out ridiculous answers. A great example occurred when new host, Steve Harvey, asked a contestant to, “name a type of doctor who should never ask you to remove your clothing.” A bubbly, overzealous, southern belle enthusiastically shouted, “Gynecologist!”  Steve was baffled and wondered, out loud, “how the heck is he supposed to administer the exam?” I was more stunned by the supportive sister, who repeatedly shouted, “good answer!”

Harvey does a decent job of hosting, but I miss the original host, Richard Dawson. His episodes are classic due to the fact that he always kissed the female contestants on their lips. I always stared in amazement when the husbands watched the “pervy” host plant a wet one on their wives; it was awkward, to say the least.

     Ray Combs is the host of Family Feud, as far as I’m concerned. It’s not that I think he is the best; I just grew up watching him as the host. I didn’t even know Richard Dawson preceded him, until the networks began replaying the original episodes.

     Louie Anderson was a funny host, but it appears he was fired over some sex scandal. Allegedly, Louie enjoyed paying men for sexual favors; he agreed to pay $100,000 to keep one of his men quiet, allegedly! I didn’t really see too many of his episodes, but he did a good job. (Google the scandal if you are interested in more details!)

     Richard Karn, better known as Al from Home Improvement, was the host for a few years, but I only watched a couple of his episodes. According to the internet, he wasn’t a good host. (He’ll always be Al, to me!) If anyone argues that Karn was the best host, tell them, “I don’t think so, Tim!”

     John O’Hurley replaced Karn, and I can only remember watching a few episodes while he hosted. For those who are not familiar with O’Hurley, he played Elaine’s crazy boss, Mr. Peterman, on Seinfeld! I just can’t picture him being anyone else.

     The founders of YouTube provide a wonderful service; helping people prove they are not lying. Although I didn’t watch the show during the reign of John O’Hurley, I once witnessed an episode of his which left me speechless. It was almost too stereotypical and no one believed me when I mentioned what happened. The incident occurred during the Fast Money round. The winning family was black and the sister played first. O’Hurley asked her to, “name something that is difficult to eat without teeth.” Her answer was, “chicken,” and she earned a respectable 37 seven points. The implausible moment happened during her brother’s turn. He repeated her answer, “chicken,” and was buzzed for the duplication. His next attempt proved tragic; he blurted out, “watermelon!” No one would have believed me if not for YouTube! Martin Luther King Jr. looked on in horror, from Heaven, and a tear rolled down his left cheek!

Here is the link: ENJOY!!! Family Feud 1

There are hundreds of funny moments so I will only mention a few. (If you have some time, YouTube Family Feud funny answers; you won’t be disappointed!) During one show hosted by Richard Dawson, he asked, “during what month of pregnancy, does a woman begin to look pregnant?” With all of the confidence in the world, the contestant answered, “September!” Dawson barely kept it together! After several minutes, he was able to continue. Eventually, he asked the sister to, “name a noisy bird.” She answered, “coo coo;” and he lost it again. Dawson said, “coo coo? How did you people get on the show?” (This is the funniest clip ever!)

Here is the link: Family Feud 2

For more of the classic answers, I found another clip. One contestant was asked to, “name an animal with three letters in its name.” The “genius” responded, “alligator!”

Check out the clip: Family Feud 3

In another clip, which is a compilation, the first “genius” gave a great answer when Dawson asked him to, “name a famous Peter.” The guy quickly tapped the buzzer and proudly said, “Peter!” The next contestant also provided several Mensa-esque  answers. He was asked to, “name something that comes in pairs,” and responded, “bananas!” He immediately realized his answer and wished he had a ticket on Southwest Airlines! (“Wanna get away?”)

Our genius continued to amaze the audience during the Fast Money round. He was asked to, “name a time that most people get up,” and replied, “morning!” His next question was, “name a time when most people go to bed.” He answered, “night!” The most shocking thing, is the fact that he received two points for, “night!”

Here is the clip: Family Feud 4

My last clip is hysterical. A woman is asked to, “name a question such as, how old are you, that you would answer with a lie.” The first woman jumped the gun and answered before he finished the question; she said, “eighteen,” and wished she allowed Dawson to finish. The next woman answered, “I would say fifty!” Dawson then asked the guy who was next, to answer and he replied, “I would say I’m thirty nine!” Dawson was at his whit’s end.

This clip is also a compilation. Another woman is asked to, “name a noisy bird.” She answered, “chipmunk!” She immediately cringed!

Here is the clip: Family Feud 5

If you ever plan on throwing away thirty minutes of your life by being unproductive, there is no better way than to spend it watching Family Feud. I don’t think I ever watched an episode sans at least one dumb answer!

For those of you who decide to search through YouTube for some funny clips, or if you have one which has always stuck with you, please don’t hesitate to mention it in the comments section; I would love to share a laugh!

@PeteTeix617

Published by Peter Teixeira

First and foremost, I enjoy writing stories. I recently completed my first novel, and I successfully co-wrote a short film script, which won the grand prize in the words made easy competition.

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2 Comments

  1. Funniest one I seen, was a Christian family. The Wife answer to this question was hilarous. “name one thing you put in your mouth, but don’t swallow” she answered “Sperm” Steve, and I, nearly had a heart attack. To her embarrassment she got the buzzer.

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