The Atheist’s Burden

In 1899, British writer Rudyard Kipling, of The Jungle Book fame, wrote a poem entitled The White Man’s Burden. (I’m not your history teacher, so if you have a desire to learn more about his piece, do your own research!) I’ve never been mistaken for poet, but here is my first poem:

I stole Kipling’s style! (copy is such an ugly word!)

 

Take up the atheist’s burden—

 

Seek out the truth revealed—

 

Read the texts, study the faiths

 

Until your minds are healed

 

A godless world is splendid

 

No war, no hate, no schism—

 

A godless world is coming,

 

For joy we’ll sing in rhythm

 

Take up the atheist’s burden

 

Logic is what we’ll spread

 

A new world void of deities

 

Religion will be dead;

 

Censorship no more

 

Free thoughts we all will share

 

A future shaped by science

 

Spawning geniuses to spare

 

Take up the atheist’s burden—

 

Reborn is how you’ll feel:

 

The brainwashed will be doomed

 

Denying what is real—

 

Our dumb will become dumber

 

The light they cannot see:

 

The sheep without their shepherd,

 

They’ll never let it be

 

Take up the atheist’s burden-

 

Prophets led you astray-

 

Fear not the nonexistent,

 

 Be wise and never pray.

 

The unknown we cannot fear

 

A universe for exploring,

 

Only one thing is for certain,

 

Sundays without the boring!

 

Not too shabby, if you ask me!

 

I enjoy creating pictures with funny captions, but I tend to censor myself because I don’t think the Facebookers can handle some of my “extreme” ideas. I’m sure I’ll end up not giving a crap in the near future, but for now, I’ll only release the uncensored material on the blog.

 

Here are my latest Facebook postings along with a bonus one which I decided not to put up.

ONE

I know he’s good!

TWO

Mommy, why is Jesus sad?

THREE

Oh!

FOUR

Awkward isn’t the word!

FIVE

Now it all makes sense!

SIX

Thanks, but no thanks!

SEVEN

His sixth sense is amazing!

BONUS

You bought that lie!

@PeteTeix617

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11 responses to “The Atheist’s Burden

  1. Really?! You thought that last one would be too offensive, more so then the one about rape or hitler?! I don’t think so. I think you’ve already gone beyond the line of over the top, so post and keep entertaining those of us that have a sense of humor!

    • Ha ha! I was actually supposed to have it read, “‘god’ inveted pussy and he never fucked,” but I censored it for Facebook and was too lazy to redo it. I thought calling “god” a virgin would cause some people to be upset.

  2. Haha! Anything negative you say about god is going to get ppl that can’t see the humor in it upset so why sensor yourself? If you’re gonna go there, go all the way…that’s what she said! I’m trying to work on my “that’s what she said” lines….some ppl have told me they’re kind of lame. I guess its because if it were up to me I’d use it in almost everything I say! How was that one?!

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