Her Favorite Thing
A few days ago, one of our regular customers entered the store with her three year-old son. After several minutes of shopping, he ventured on his own to a different aisle. A few seconds later, he began to yell, “Mommy, mommy, where are you?” His mother, along with everyone else in the store, heard him loud and clear. He continued to shout until she finally responded. “I’m over here!” Satisfied that he had her undivided attention, the boy yelled, “you forgot to buy your favorite thing!” She had no idea what he was talking about and didn’t answer. He repeated his statement and ran towards her. Once he arrived close enough to see his mother, the boy held up the “favorite thing:” it was a pack of maxi pads. She turned to look at her virtuous son, only to be horrified. “Go put that back; I don’t need it!” She hollered. The boy was persistent; he didn’t want his mother to forget her favorite thing. “You like this. You have to put it in your underwear!” He said matter factly. “Go put it back!” She ordered. This young mom was thoroughly embarrassed. The only thing missing was the voice over saying, “WANNA GET AWAY!” The boy, defeated, returned the package to its shelf; he was completely bewildered as to why his mother didn’t want her favorite thing. I did my best to act as if I didn’t witness the entire incident, but I am sure the mother was well aware that I didn’t miss a moment. Kids say the darndest things! BELIEVE IT OR NOT!
The Florida Gators continue to prepare for their January 2nd Bowl Game against the Ohio State Buckeyes!
Tomorrow is December 18th, 2011. We all know what that means; the BIG game is upon us. I look forward to watching the Great Tim Tebow lead the MIGHTY Denver Broncos against the lowly New England Patsies; better known as the Brady Bunch! (To all New England fans, it’s time to change: Sha na na na, na na na na na, sha na na na na. Sha na na na, na na na na na, sha na na na na!
***Sunday at 4:15pm, is the deadline for Patsy fans to jump on the Broncos wagon!***
Everyone is expecting a close game, but I just can’t see it happening. Am I mistaken, or did the Patsies struggle with some of three of the league’s worst teams? This game is going to be a complete blowout. The Broncos’ defense will come out and smack Tom Brady on the mouth, followed by Tim Tebow launching lasers to uncovered receivers. Eric Decker and Demaryius Thomas will have career games; I guarantee it! Willis McGahee will run for a buck fifty and the Broncos league leading run game will easily break two hundred yards on the ground! In a way, I am a tad bit disappointed by the fact that we will not get to see Tebow Time; there will be no need for a last minute comeback!
Don’t forget that we have the second coming of Jesus! I am not talking about Tim Tebow; Demaryius Thomas was born on Christmas Day!!! (Somehow, Jesus has returned even though he never existed!)
**Thanks to @EFidalgo12 for pointing out Thomas’ birthdate!**
To read about my history with the Denver Broncos, click the link: Bronco Life.
Here are some of the hard facts:
Brady is 1-6 against the Broncos. (We just don’t lose to the Patsies; I have no idea why people can’t face reality!)
Take a look at the Patsies in there last three games:
Patsies 38 – Eagles 20 currently ranked 27th (4-9) *Michael Vick did not play*
Patsies 31— Colts 24 currently ranked 32nd (0-13)
Paties 34 – Redskins 27 currently ranked 21st (5-8)
The most telling fact: The Patsies are dead last in total defense. Ranked 32!!!
My Prediction: Broncos 38 – Patsies 14
This will be one of the most enjoyable sporting events of my life.
***SPOILER ALERT: Celebratory post, coming Monday!***
Be sure to check back tomorrow for a preview of next week’s posts!
IT’S TEBOW TIME!!!