Twitter v Facebook

The two dollar and fifty cent question is, “Which is better?” (For those of you who ball harder than $2.50…Congrats!)

Obviously, the answer to the BIG question is completely subjective. Deciding which is better is also based on who your friends are! (There is no way of knowing which social media site is better without experiencing each one firsthand!) To me, deciding which site is better, would be like asking me which of my posts is my favorite! (Blog Posts are not like children; you can choose between them! My favorite post has to be July 4th’s entry, ‘Why I Cry On The 4th of July!’ If you haven’t already…you know the drill!)

My true preference would be to erase both accounts and live a life of bliss, without either social media site. “Then why don’t you, jackass?” Wow, I didn’t know social media meant so much to you. Sorry I revealed my true feelings!

The reason I have both accounts is my goal of publishing my first novel. The novel is also the reason I started this blog in the first place. (Maybe I’ll write a blurb about my book for one of next week’s posts in order to get some feedback from people on whether or not the story is of interest!) I was completely against social media before I joined, but now realize how useful the sites can be.

“Which is better?” Sorry, I’ll get to the point!

I joined Facebook before I actually joined Facebook. “What the hell does that mean?” My cousin Nira created the page for me, and when people started interacting with my page, I was forced to join. (The truth is, I was planning on joining eventually…she sort of SPED-up the process!) I actually enjoyed Facebook in the beginning. The site is a great way to keep in contact with my wonderful family and friends. Facebook is also the world’s foremost reminder of birthdays! There are some funny people in my circle and I enjoy their daily shenanigans!

“Why did you say you enjoyed Facebook in the beginning? Did something change?” YES! I revealed the fact that I was an ATHEIST!

There are some wonderful people who are capable of fearing “god” and finding a place in their hearts for me. These people give me hope that the future of religion will not be to convert others. Future religionists will find a way to love their respective deities without being intolerant of others! To those special Facebook friends, I say, THANKS…You’re the best!

     If I am atheist, do I not bleed? (I watch way too much Seinfeld!)

     If you have a problem with my religious choice, or lack thereof, pray for me! If your “god” is as wonderful as you say, he’ll find a way to touch me. (I hope not through a priest! *Fingers Crossed* ***SUPER CROSSED***)

It’s awful when religion can change the way people treat one another. In fact, it’s sad. Disliking someone because of religion is more depressing than listening to James Blunts’ ‘Goodbye My Lover’ after a crushing break-up! (I challenge anyone to play the song while looking at a picture of a former lover! **Talk about waterworks!**)

I don’t like the fact that my Facebook, sometimes, has a church feel to it. There are the few outlaws who keep me thoroughly entertained, but I can do without the “god” is good comments, and Jesus pictures? (I’m not suggesting that people accommodate me, I’m just saying I can do without the Jesufication of Facebook! Yes, I made that word up. Don’t bother googling it!) Save the Jesufication for your profile on Christian Mingle!  I’m not saying people shouldn’t post whatever they want, but for my preference, social media should be a place where people escape and have a fun time! (I appreciate the fact that the very aspects of my Facebook which put a damper on my experience may enhance someone else’s day, which is the main reason why I don’t post comments on what the religious folk write.)

Twitter is a completely different animal! Like everyone else, whenever I was asked to join Twitter, I would reply, “I don’t want to know when everyone is using the bathroom or combing their hair!” (The last statement is truly the average perception of Twitter from people who don’t have an account! Everyone has said something similar at least once in their life…we’re all guilty!) Obviously, there are some random tweets about basic daily functions, but for the most part, Twitter is wonderful! Not only do you get to see how ridiculous your friends are, but it’s a great way to interact with celebrities, or favorite athletes! Twitter is a place where people are truly insane! To understand Twitter is to experience Twitter! It’s completely about fun, although there are those who take some of the comments personally, but that’s their own hang-up. (People need to stop being so overly sensitive and dramatic!)

Honestly, when it comes to social media, there is no better site! Each one has great attributes, and will allow people to connect with family and friends. As far as the writing industry, Twitter and Facebook both provide great opportunities to connect with helpful people. Although, when it comes to the “best movie based on a social media site” category, Facebook is unmatched. At the end of the day, my smart phone allows me to use both Facebook and Twitter easily, and I urge others to do the same. (Just leave your problems at Facebook…Twitter is about having a great time!)

I would give examples of great tweets from the people I follow on Twitter, but their words are for their followers. My words are for the world to enjoy, or be repulsed by! Here are some of my favorite tweets!

I will add a couple tweets from one person I follow, @Jesus_M_Christ! That’s right folks; Jesus has a Twitter account! It’s not what you think…the M stands for motherfuckin’, and he is hilarious!

     @Jesus_M_Christ: I don’t know why I’m always in paintings with children. I hung around with prostitutes and outcasts, priests are the ones that like kids.

     Best benefit of being able to heal yourself? NO CONDOMS!

     Follow the guy…HE’S HILARIOUS!


     Now for some of my favorite Pete Tweets:

     My wallet thinks taking a chick out to dinner before sex is a mild form of prostitution! #walletssaythedarndestthings

     There is a possibility that semen can cure the common cold. Any lady looking to participate in a scientific research project. DM me ASAP! (For those who are not on Twitter, DM means direct message!)

     For the foreseeable future, Miami Hurricanes football will be downgraded to a level 1 tropical storm! #TheU

     “All I wanna do is zooma-zoom-zoom-zoom in a boom-boom” It’s funny when random songs pop into your head!

     STDs…You want ’em, I got ’em #hitmeup!

     I wish prostitutes were more reasonable…an extra $50 bucks for no condom? It’s not like they’re going to catch anything!

     Sucks for microsoft, I had to #Google bing to find out what it was!

     Wondering if banging her could be considered a homosexual act. #ForTheSport

     Parking 5 streets away so people don’t see your car in front of her spot. #ForTheSport

     “Doesn’t she look like she was in ‘the blind side’?” Sandra bullock? “No, Michael Oher!” #ForTheSport

     My AIDS ruined my day! Wait, is that spelled right? I’m talking about my two helpers.

     I like my women like I like the circus…big top and leaving town in two weeks!

     Writing, I slept like a baby last night! A newborn baby, waking up every two hours, yelling and screaming!

     “I prayed every night for a new bike. I realized that the lord doesn’t work that way so I stole one and asked him to forgive me”EmoPhilips

     “Don’t pray in my school, and I won’t think in your church” atheist quotes

     “Atheism is a non-prophet organization” – unknown (Atheist quotes)

     FYI: take your problems to #facebook – twitter is for entertainment… we don’t give a shit!

     Just washed my lucky condom! Royal Wedding – IT’S ABOUT TO GO DOWN!!!

     I wanna #BagUp and have twins. I’ll be forced to call them: “Siemar” = CMR (cash money records) “siembee” = CMB (cash money ballers)

     What the hell is in this thing? Why can’t I pick this little #BagUp

     #menshealth: Inserting your penis into a new vagina daily will decrease stress and increase overall health. *side effects = AIDS #BagUp

     AIDS test in an hour. I studied all night! *crosses fingers*

     Drunk guys pick chicks like I pick cars… all about the automatics – no standards! #4thesporttweet

     “You hang ’em, we bang ’em” great phrase when talking about hitting homeruns. Horrible phrase when talking about slavery!

     What?… dinner and movie. – sorry, I don’t do that on the first date! #morals

     In 1989, my allowance got me 1000 shares in pussy @ 65.36 Saving it for marriage my ass. Just checked nasdaq PUS is @5.01 FUCK!

     Kids, stay in school or you’ll work @mcdonalds. No such thing as double quarter pounder. 1/4+1/4=2/4 simplified 1/2 pounder #whyUneedmath

     Watching the Bruins on telemundo… Goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooal! 3-0.

     Playing for Denver Broncos, meeting hot 17 year old, not touching her #morals. Waiting for her 18th bday to smash #welcometothedmv patience



     P.S. The aforementioned outlaws who are my friends on Facebook, I hope the tweets above inspire you to join Twitter…it’s where your outrageous status updates really belong! I would name some of you, but you know who you are!!!



Published by Peter Teixeira

First and foremost, I enjoy writing stories. I recently completed my first novel, and I successfully co-wrote a short film script, which won the grand prize in the words made easy competition.

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