Last Friday, we walked down Lankershim Blvd in North Hollywood, a stone’s throw from our new apartment, and we passed by what appeared to be a night club. The line was unbelievably long, and the VIP line was also packed. “This must be the hottest spot in town,” we thought. We made a mental note to visit the place in the future; Tokyo Delves sushi bar seemed to call to us. The following evening, we decided to walk by and see if the Saturday crowd mirrored the previous night’s. To our surprise, the line was empty. We approached the bouncer and inquired about the place. He informed us that the restaurant only does three shows a night. It was a little after nine, and there was one empty table left. We also learned the eight o’clock show ended at ten thirty; the restaurant is cleared for the next show. I didn’t want to be limited, but @EFidalgo12 convinced me to give the place a try. We walked in and our waitress, Laura, was welcoming. The entire staff continued to push us towards taking saki bombs, but we finished off a bottle of Jack prior to entering the place. (My apologies to johnnie Walker!) Long story short, we did four saki bombs and the night was amazing. The wait staff is comprised of actors and actresses who perform different singing and dancing acts, throughout the night. (I can’t decide if the NSYNC show or the Beauty and the Beast act was my favorite!) We managed to get on the VIP list for the last show and returned. Great Food, Great Staff, and the time of your life! Everyone is drunk, including the staff, who are encouraged to drink, plus, all of the customers get up and dance. (Many get on their chairs!) I never thought I would find a sushi place that I liked more than Fuji in Quincy, Ma, but Tokyo Delves is the world’s Greatest Sushi Bar! BELIEVE IT OR NOT!
I love the New York Giants! (I don’t want to go to church!)
I wanted to write a post which included all of the little things that make me laugh, but for some reason, I can only come up with one. Tonight, on the eve of our trip to LA, @Efidalgo12 and I decided to go over the script and add all of the finishing touches. (It is past 4am, I am finally done packing, and my mind is in remedial mode! Furthermore, we’re leaving at 6:30am!)
We successfully completed the corrections, but I’m sure once I read the script during the flight, there will be more adjustments. @Efidalgo12 will also decide to add new wrinkles. (Writers are never truly satisfied; we always feel as if we can enhance something to improve the project!)
Here is the one little thing which I recalled:
A couple months ago, I decided to create a Facebook page for the blog. Originally, the page was named Peter Teixeira. When I launched the page, I was the first to click the “like” button. For the entire day, the Facebook widget read, “One person likes Peter Teixeira,” and below was a picture of me! (Partly, I wished that it would remain the same forever, but change is inevitable!)
I honestly can’t remember any of the many hilarious little things, but I’ll include an excerpt from Penn Jillette’s book, which I’ve been reading. I found many hilarious quotes, but I have decided to only include this one. When discussing family friends who are lesbians, Jillette writes, “Hey, you talk against lesbians around my fucking family, we take you down to Chinatown.” (I don’t know why, but I love that line!)
I honestly want to end this post right here, but for some reason, I don’t feel as if it is complete. I will take a few moments to try and come up with at least a couple more little things.
Last week, I invited my nephew for some sushi. There is a place relatively close to my neighborhood, and he agreed to accompany me. I parked in an empty spot across the street from the restaurant, and we crossed Washington St without being killed. I would name the establishment, but I always forget what it is called and I am way too tired to look it up. I approached the door and attempted to pull it open; the large wooden object did not budge. “You’re supposed to push it open!” My nephew mocked, while laughing. “Thank you genius!” I replied. We placed our order and after paying, I decided to drive to the nearby fish store to pick up some Cray fish for my Redtail Carfish. (I figured it was only fair to bring home a treat for the fish, as well!) I told the accommodating woman that we would return shortly, I shared the plan with my nephew and we headed for the door. As if I am a complete moron, I pushed. Laughter filled the foyer, then I heard, “I can’t believe it; you’re so dumb! I can’t wait until we come back to see if you can finally get it right! You’re 0 for 2!” All I could do was laugh. I am proud to announce that I did in fact learn the proper procedure, and I will never make the mistake again!
Last summer, on a warm Sunday night, my nephew joined me for one of our many missions to kill hunger; he decided he wanted Wendy’s. For some reason, I decided to drive to the fast food joint in Quincy. (Don’t ask me why; I just love Quincy!) It was an uneventful trip. We returned to the house and I parked the car in the yard. We walked towards the gate, and he waited for me to lock up. I had a bag of food in my left hand along with the keys, the chain and lock in my right hand along with my soft drink. (If you know me, you probably think I ordered a Coke, but Wendy’s is one of those “other cola” only establishments so I went with Mountain Dew!) I’ve done this a thousand times with little trouble, but for some reason, the comedy gods favor my nephew. Inexplicably, my drink crashed, creating a small pond fit for ants and beetles. For a second, I thought I was seated in the bleachers at Fenway Park, during the ninth inning of a playoff game, watching David Ortiz hit a game winning homerun. My nephew was jumping up and down and yelling, “Yay! Great job idiot!” Again, there was nothing I could do, other than laugh!
That’s all I am willing to force myself to produce!
Thanks for reading! (I trust that Jet Blue has a strict policy against drunk pilots so we should arrive safely in Los Angeles!)
For those of you who don’t know, I ate sushi for the first time on April 16, 2011. It was amazing! (For the best sushi in the Boston area, go to Fuji 1546 in Quincy. I recommend the Gyunegimaki, it’s incredible! *I chose the adjective incredible because you can’t spell it without edible and the sushi is quite edible!* Tell them I sent you; they won’t know what the hell you’re talking about.) About a month ago, I was driving to pick up my order from Fuji and, I’ll admit, I was speeding. My brother and a cousin were also in the car. Out of nowhere, a jeep began to follow me. At first, I thought he was having fun but he was driving like a maniac. It seemed as if the driver was trying to get my attention, but I didn’t know who was in the car, so I drove even faster and he remained right on my tail. (Don’t be childish; he wasn’t literally on my tail.) After a couple miles of professional driving, I pulled into an empty space across from the restaurant and he pulled in behind me. Noticing that he stopped, I banged a quick U-turn and planned on parking in the lot at the rear of the building. A police officer, in full uniform, ran out of the jeep and stood in the middle of the road; he motioned for me to stop. All I could think was, “FUCK!” I parked and he stomped over to the driver’s side window. “Where are you going in such a hurry?” he yelled! “I’m picking up some food, officer. I’m not in a hurry at all.” I said in a calm voice. “Are you kidding me? You were doing 80 back there.” He said, still out of breath. “I completely disagree with you, sir. I was not doing 80; that would be ridiculous. How could I possibly go 80 miles per hour with all the red lights?” I reasoned. “Ok, you didn’t hit 80, but you were speeding! You were driving recklessly, and you passed about twenty-five cars.” He exaggerated. “Again officer, I have to disagree. There weren’t even twenty-five cars on the road.” I stated non-threateningly. “I’ll give you that, but you did pass some cars. What’s your problem.” He said snidely. “Well officer, I was driving down the road and, out of nowhere, you started chasing after me. I didn’t know who you were and you were driving like a maniac. I was just trying to get away from you.” I explained in a friendly tone. “Get away from me? I have a jeep and I could barely keep up with your sports car.” He shot back. “Sports car? This is a sedan, not a sports car.” I taunted. “You got all the answers. Give me your license and registration.” He said, giving up. “No problem officer.” I handed him my license and registration and he walked away. By this time, two Quincy Police marked vehicles were on the scene. Several minutes later, he returned. “Get out of the car.” He yelled. “For what, officer; am I being arrested?” I asked. “No, you can’t drive, your license is suspended.” He lied. “No problem.” I switched seats with my cousin. The officer walked over to the passenger side of the vehicle with a ticket in hand. “You’re lucky! This is just a warning because I am off duty.” He said visibly annoyed. “Why can’t I drive sir; my license is not suspended. I just received a notice in the mail saying that it will be suspended at the beginning of the next month if I don’t pay the fine I owe, but it is currently not suspended.” (I received a stop sign violation and I paid the ticket, it wasn’t anything major!) “No, your license is suspended. You’re lucky I’m not on duty or else I would have taken you in! I am recommending that you receive a (I can’t remember what he said, but it was some made up bullshit.) Expect a summons in the mail.” He said in a threatening manner before handing me the ticket. “Thank you officer. Have a wonderful evening. Are we free to pick up our sushi?” I said mockingly. “Just make sure that you aren’t the one driving.” He ordered. “I’m in the passenger seat. My cousin will drive.” I pointed out. No reply! He had enough of my backtalk. The policemen watched my cousin drive away. He parked near the front entrance and we exited the “sports car;” they remained on guard. Upon exiting Fuji, they were nowhere to be seen! Talking back to police is a privilege only enjoyed by the non-criminal! Thank “god” I stayed in school! (Did he just thank “god?”) BELIEVE IT OR NOT!
Check back tomorrow for a preview of next week’s entries!