Originally, I planned on waiting a week before writing this post because I wanted people to read without allowing emotions to cloud their judgment. Upon second thought, I realize that emotional people will always be emotional, so there is no point in waiting. I also don’t mind being called emotionally dead! (For more of my thoughts on suicide, read yesterday’s post: Sui Caedere.)

First of all, let’s get one thing straight; Seau was a San Diego Charger; period. All of you Patsy fans can stop with the nonsense about him being a former member of your crappy team! (He played in only New England in the twilight of his career!)

     I’ve decided that people who commit suicide do not get to be honored. If you take the coward’s way out, we don’t have to respect them.

I’m aware of all the excuses that people are throwing out in order to explain why it was ok for Seau to take his own life, but it’s all a bunch of nonsense. We have to stop making excuses for the weak. Being too proud to seek out help is not a sign of manliness; it’s a clear sign of weakness. Pride is ridiculous and will lead to the downfall of the idiot. I believe judge Milian of the people’s court refers to such “caveman” behavior as “Quien es mas macho!” (If you don’t know what that means, Google it!) Hiding your pain and putting on a brave face has no Redeeming quality.

Honestly, can anyone think of a more selfish act? I was happy to hear a few of the radio personalities on ESPN talk about Seau’s decision in a negative light. I hate when people die and they are made out to be a hero. If Seau was murdered, then this would have been a great American tragedy, but people who take their own lives are never to be celebrated. They are the poster children for how not to solve problems.

I just can’t bring myself to feel sorry for someone who lived a pampered life. Seau was a star at USC, and a star in the NFL; he made millions of dollars and was loved by millions of fans. I get it; he never won a Super Bowl, but you don’t see Dan Marino playing Russian Roulette with a shotgun. If Seau didn’t feel he deserved to live, I say good riddance! (I know money doesn’t solve problems, but there are plenty of poor people going through a lot worse and they continue struggling for survival on a daily basis!)

Seau was said to be a great ambassador for the NFL, but his legacy is tainted; he set a poor example by committing suicide and it is the responsibility of all parents to teach their children that it is wrong to run from their problems. All of the stories about his great character and leadership abilities mean nothing because his final message to the world is “quitting is ok!”

This former superstars’ children did not ask to be born. He had a responsibility to be here for them. Yes, he may have left behind a vast wealth, but who will walk his daughter down the aisle and who will his children turn to in times of hardship. How will his offspring find the strength to face adversity when the one person who was supposed to set an example failed them?

People say that it’s wrong to talk negatively about the dead. “Let Seau rest in peace.” They say. They couldn’t be more wrong. That is a terrible approach; we cannot allow suicide to become the an accepted act. We have a duty to set an example for the future generations. It is important to call out the cowards in order to send a clear message to anyone who is going through a period of suffering. SUICIDE IS NEVER THE ANSWER!

There are those who say, “the use of the word coward is too harsh.” What would these people have me call such a man? I can’t think of a more appropriate word!

To make matters worse, this is actually the second occasion in which Seau attempted to take his own life. He drove his car off a cliff in 2010 after a fight with his girlfriend, but survived the “accident.” I guess the old adage is right; second time was the charm. When someone attempts suicide and they survive, it’s easy for the individual to lie and say that it was an accident. Twice? That seems like someone who really doesn’t want to live. Seau had two years between suicide attempts. That is more than enough time to seek out help; there are no excuses for his lack of determination. (“Fool me once…you fooled me; can’t get fooled again!” misquoted by George W. Bush!)

When you are going through tough times, stay the course and you’ll persevere; don’t pull a Seau!

No mother should ever have to go through this!


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Sui Caedere

I have a lot to say about the recent death of a NFL Hall of Famer, but some people are starting to believe that I am emotionally dead, so I won’t discuss the specific incident. Obviously I am not emotionally dead; the truth is people allow their own emotions to cloud their judgment and I simply focus on facts. (You’ll have to forgive me for not caring that a multimillionaire couldn’t deal with his problems and decided to take his own life!)

***The previous comment was made under the presumption that initial reports are correct and the incident was in fact a suicide.***

     To me, suicide is the quintessential cowardly act. (There is an exception; child suicide is completely different. To read my thoughts on child suicide, click on the link: Bullying and Suicide.)

There are literally billions of people on this planet who live below the poverty line. There are millions of people who die from different diseases. There are millions of newborn babies who are born with the HIV virus and many other suicide inducing life dilemmas; the answer is never taking one’s life. (Unless “god” wants you to take your life!)

Although taking one’s life is arguably the most difficult thing a human being can do, I still think it’s the cowards way of dealing with a difficult situation. Life isn’t supposed to be easy; there will be many curve balls thrown, and just when you learn to hit the curves, life will throw you a slider. The fit will survive and the weakest will quit. Don’t be a quitter by killing yourselves. (I apologize to any creationists for referencing Darwin; obviously, all science, and his work specifically, was inspired by the devil!)

I know; I know! “If someone in your family committed suicide, you would feel differently.” Not a chance. My uncle committed suicide and I spoke to him on a regular basis. We talked all the time and shared many laughs. When he took his life, the only sadness I felt was for his wife; she deserved better. My uncle had some challenges to deal with, but nothing that comes close to justifying his actions. I honestly feel that he took the cowardly way out.

Please be advised, if I am found dead and the police determine that I took my own life, act like Flava Flav and don’t believe the hype. I enjoy living and I’ll be here until my luck runs out! Find out which child of “god” decided that they were ridding the world of an evil being and alert the authorities. (If my murder assassination isn’t at the hands of an overzealous believer, please look into who is listed as the benefactor in my will and you got your killer!)

Please do me a favor and stop crying when random celebrities, who have absolutely no connection to you, die! (Especially if the individual takes a self-inflicted fatal shotgun wound to the chest!)

***If you are going to mourn the loss of a random celebrity because you feel that it makes you a caring human being, the least you can do is write your RIP comments on a post-it note and stick it to your fridge; not everyone on Facebook gives a shit!***


Bullying & Suicide

Let me preface this post by stating a fact. Bullying is wrong and has no place in society.

That being said, bullies will always be present. The key is to teach children how to react to a bully. As long as parents continue to plop their children in front of the boob-tube, kids will learn to become bullies. We live in a cruel society and children are aware of everything that goes on around them. (Note to parents: Stop allowing the TV to raise your children!)

I attended Boston Latin and it seemed as if the school was full of bullies. People just found a way to get with the program. Obviously, bullying shouldn’t exist, but anyone who can make it through adverse situations will be better prepared for the real world. After all, isn’t that what school is all about! (You can’t prevent other children from being bullies, but you can teach your children how to deal with bullying; that’s part of being a parent!)

I honestly consider the “bullying” that occurred in high school as good-natured ribbing, but I can understand the opposing view. At BLS, every class has a will. There are designated pages in the yearbook in which students write random comments. Our will was so bad that it was disallowed. (There were comments about a girl who everyone voted ‘Most likely to become a head master;” nothing unusual about that. Until the faculty learned that she was elected because she performed fellatio on a fellow graduating senior!)

Recently there have been two notable cases in which children have committed suicide “because of bullying.” You have to be kidding me. Bullying is bad, but it doesn’t cause people to kill themselves. I don’t have the exact numbers but if I was going to ballpark-it, I would say that there are 836 million cases of bullying that occur in the world each year. Out of that number, I would say, there are 13 suicides, worldwide. Blaming bullies is simply wrong. (Parents need to take responsibility!)

Bullies should be punished by the school principals and their parents, not the court system. Parents and teachers have to step it up. There are too many kids who persevere through difficult situations, for anyone to blame bullies for suicides. Some children don’t have the parental guidance to help them get through life’s hardships. Many people feel sorry for the children who kill themselves, but I feel sorry for the bullies. They are blamed for the actions of unloved children. (It’s absolutely unfair!)

Parents who go on television and blame other children for the death of their unloved child are out of touch with reality. These are the types of incidents which cause me to be a major proponent of forced abortions. Every occupation in this world requires some form of testing or screening process, but any horny idiot with a willing sex partner can have a child. It’s ridiculous. (People should be screened before we allow them to have children; it’s not right to allow a child to come into this world under adverse situations!)

Adults who commit suicide have only themselves to blame, but child suicide is the cause of bad parenting. If a parent loses his or her child to suicide, there will be many friends and family members who say, “don’t blame yourself.” I say bullshit. Parents should accept full responsibility for adolescent suicides.

It breaks my heart to watch children be vilified for bullying their schoolmates. Making an example of children because they committed acts which were learned from society is wrong. Bullies should be chastised but they are not murderers.

Suicide prevention is simple; involve yourself in your child’s life. Take an active role. Parenting is not like sports; you don’t get credit for trying your best. Be responsible and raise your children the right way. “Who determines the right way?” Let’s start with teaching your children not to kill themselves. Being a parent is a difficult job; many people are not prepared. (We can’t blame others for bad parenting!)

“It’s not fair to blame parents if a depressed child commits suicide.” Are you kidding me? Yes, I agree; parents can’t be blamed if a child has depression, but parents can be blamed for not helping the child get through the low moments. How do you not know that your child is depressed? Get involved. Take the child to a therapist and do whatever it takes to heal the child. (There is nothing that a parent’s love can’t cure!)

There is a clear distinction between adult suicide and child suicide. Children don’t know any better; they have to be taught that their lives have value. Adults are different. I can never feel sorry for an adult who commits suicide. (This is coming from someone whose uncle committed suicide!)

I once took a class called The Anthropology of Death’ in which we watched a documentary about suicide. The name of the film is The Bridge. I actually viewed the documentary before I signed up for the course, because that’s what I do. A filmmaker placed a camera across from the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco and recorded the people who jumped to their deaths. (It’s unbelievable how many people jumped!)

There was even one guy who survived. His story was quite interesting. (Watch the movie!)

The professor asked for our opinions and I said, if I had the power, I would build a ladder for people to climb to the top of the bridge, so they could ensure death. My reasoning was, if you don’t think you deserve to live, who am I to say you should stay alive. I was pulled to the side when the period ended and the professor thought I was just trying to add shock value, but I was clear about my views; some people don’t deserve to live. (I know it’s horrible to say, but I can only speak the truth!)

To me, suicide is a cowardly act. Life has many challenges and suicide is a lame way to leave this realm. We all have difficult moments. There are many children who grow up with horrible parents and they are able to overcome every obstacle and achieve great success. Those are the true heroes!

Kids say mean things, and those children will grow up to be mean adults. Teach your children how to deal with a bully and prepare them for the future. Stop looking for excuses for your bad parenting!